Americans Outraged at Sudden Realization Interstate Highways Are Government-Run

As the debate continues to rage on over whether or not the U.S. should include a public, government-funded plan in its healthcare reform, many citizens abruptly noticed that the federal government funds and regulates all Interstate Highways in the nation, and has done so for over 50 years.

Now, many are up in arms over the largest public works project in history, which has somehow gone unnoticed since the mid-20th century.

"I can't believe I didn't think of this before," said conservative analyst Paul Dobson, slapping his forehead in disbelief. "We were all so focused on the idea of the government ruining healthcare forever that we forgot how President Eisenhower -- who was obviously tricked by President Barack Hussein Obama -- already ruined our highways by building and then socializing them in the 1950s."

"If we rely on the government to build our roads, we'll all be waiting in line for seven years, just to enter an onramp!" shouted one man, holding a sign reading "A Road Is A Road To Socialism Road". "Well, I said no to socialism transportation, and to date, I've built over 14 feet of my own road that I can travel on, tax free."


Brandon Said
Republicans or states-rights advocates would have to blame every president since Eisenhower (both sides of the aisle) for those nasty, pesky, annoying efficient, totalitarian things we call Interstate Highways.

I long for the days of Corduroy Roads of the early 19th century!

Dont tread on me.


Herbal Barb

Wait a second. Are MY taxes being used so that middle-class and poor people will have access to interstate highways? I live in a gated community and I pay for my OWN roads; why should my taxes be used to pay for roads that other people can use? I can see it coming. This government is going to undermine my private streets and force me to use socialist streets even if I don't want to. Obama's been planning this since 1961!!!


David Roadie

Wait a second. Are MY taxes being used so that middle-class and poor people will have access to interstate highways?

That's not all... Illegal immigrants and minorities have access to interstate highways... *gasp* These highways also allow "socialist" rabble to move freely about our country! How could we let this happen! Let's bring our country back to the days of the Constitution, when highways were much more rural, and dirt!


Don Chinza

I live on the National Highway (US Route 40). There are the remanents of an old toll booth down the road. . . . Why don't we go back to that so we don't need those filty socialist Interstates. . .